~To my kids~
From the age of around 20 I have always wondered what my purpose in this world is. A constant struggle to find my place and feeling like I could never be myself for fear of judgement by others. I would always mask my true feelings and I had become really good at it too. So good that at one point I could not recognise whether what I was feeling was real or just a expression of what was expected.
Then you both arrived and finally it all made sense, I had found my purpose. You flipped my world upside down and now I can’t even remember a life where you weren’t there. Even when I think back to my childhood it feels like you were right there with me watching my silly little self. I see so much of me in you, my little munchkins, you are more like your mumma than you know. You give me purpose to be the best person I can be, to be your mum, someone you need. You give me strength to face any challenge that comes my way, knowing if all else fails at least I have my two beautiful babies who will always have my back. The two tiny human beings that show me unconditional love, a love like no other. You bring me so much joy just by looking at you. Sure there are times where my patience is tested and I’m sure its vice versa (time for bed, time to eat, turn the xbox off, 1,2,3), but at the end of the day I know we have that sense of family and a family that will always protect each other.
This photo is one of my favourites taken by my most favourite photographer, he has a knack for capturing special moments and I am so grateful for him. I remember standing there against the waters edge hearing the peaceful calm of it all in silence. Admiring where we were, the paradise of it all and how blessed we were to spend it with each other. We made quiet chat about what could be lying beneath the water and as always you both told me facts about the marine life which I would have never known and it made me so proud. You both have a heart of gold my darling boys and I know you will grow up to become respectful, caring, intelligent human beings.
I love you.
Everything I am you helped me to be ~Me